Pray for my car...

My car's CD player is very selective.

Not the cool selective, like it'd rather play Dylan instead of Nickelback. Not even the annoying selective, like it'd only play Beatles albums no matter how much you tell it about Ray LaMontagne.

This morning I tried every CD I had in my car: Piper sermons, ejected. Mayer, ejected. Prince, ejected. Tom Conlon, ejected. Bill Withers, ejected. Hillsong United, ejected. FrontLineLoveWar, ejected. Skipped Dane Cook, Mitch Hedberg and Creed. Then came Timberlake. Justin Timberlake's FutureSexLoveSound. Apparently my car longs for the dance floor. Started right up and loud.

You might ask, with your nose tipped slightly higher, why I have this CD. Drum beats and bass lines. Plus, Justin's so cute.

My Morning Psalm

Tsadhe
Righteous are you, O Lord,
and right are your rules.
You have appointed your testimonies in
righteousness and in all faithfulness.
My zeal consumes me,
because my foes forget your words.
Your promise is well tried,
and your servant loves it.
I am small and despised,
yet I do not forget your precepts.
Your righteousness is righteous forever,
and your law is true.
Trouble and anguish have found me out,
but your commandments are my delight.
Your testimonies are righteous forever;
give me understanding that I may live.

Ps 119:137-144

A-maze-ing Jimmy

Click here to try it for your self. You know you want to. No cheating.

Of future's Author and Perfecter

Let's read a bit of my past. It truly does speak on its own. I'm grateful it doesn't speak this way any longer:

to future's concrete Propaganda

a friend of mine doesn't buy this heavy output of future's importance. right now there's things to do, people to help, lives to save and/or hearts to mend. to bereave time and the hearts of people i love seems to be what i fall into. i'm either too caught up in my world or looking too hard to future's propaganda of utmost importance. there's no future, at least not yet, so maybe i should let my heart and the Word determine it. and let my past speak on its own. use the present to reveal my love. its a hard look to delve into my actions and see how they speak about my heart. i think i'll do that. if i believe my friend's heart and life and death, then shouldn't my feet and hands sing louder than my guitar?

I find that my punctuation has adapted mostly to using capital letters at the beginning of my sentences. That's one thing... um.. I would still defend that there are things to do, people to help and hearts to heal. Yep, that I retain. Let's see... oh yeah, ok here it is: "there's no future, at least not yet, so maybe I should let my heart and the Word determine it." I repent and shutter to think that I would say my heart determines the future. I might be able to fandangle an explanation of how that fits theologically, but I'll not waste the brain power and say that the Lord has made it exceedingly clear that this world, including the past, present and future, are in His hands alone. Jesus upholds the universe itself by the word of his power. This is the truth.

I would still posit that my life, death, hands and feet should sing lounder than my 60 watt tube amp. (Believe me, that's loud.)

Tasty Theology with ZeFronk

As my encouraging baseball coach told me when I hit my first and only home run, "Even a blind squirrel finds a nut." Disney has presented its young viewers, probably unintentionally, with an age old philosophical dilemma and point of thought for the ordination of evil.

ZeFronk, a french wiener-dog with an affinity for cooking on a 3 year-old level, is constantly protecting his culinary masterpieces such as Ze Ants on a Log (celery, peanut butter and rains - you get it) from his adversary, Dom. Dom is, of course, a lazy cat that waits for these tasty treats to come to fruition only to steal them.

In one episode, Dom tried a bit of reverse psychology. He decided that he'd no longer pursue ZeFronk's tasty treats. As ZeFronk began making his ZeFronksicles, he and his sidekick, Sue, (a lovely bird) were constantly looking out for Dom. When they notice that he is no longer pursuing their treats, the whole process breaks done as ZeFronk proclaims that he could not make ze tasty treats if Dom is not trying to steal them.

Like the smelling of burnt popcorn*, the theological/philosophical dilemma that the episode was based on wafted to my attention: dualism. ZeFronk has found his purpose in opposing Dom. If he no longer needs to oppose Dom, he losses his purpose or meaning. (*You know how it goes - at first all excited about the smell of popcorn, then... dangit. It's burnt popcorn. No thanks. )

This dualism is not the reality the Bible presents (see Job)There are not two equal forces of ZeFronk (the forces of good) and Dom (the forces of evil) that are in battle; a scenario where sometimes Dom wins and sometimes ZeFronk. Our purpose is not found in this struggle. The purposes and effects of all things good and holy is not dependent on the forces of evil to exist or continue. But as the Lord would show in Christ, the suffering servant, evil is ordained to accomplish the purposes of God the Father for our benefit and His Glory. The God we serve is creator, sustainer and ruler over all. He is as strong as Shakespeare was over McBeth and more loving than any human father to his child.

So, ZeFronk, keep making those ZeFronksicles, ZePancakes and ZeBanana Dogs. The fruit of your life is more than opposing Dom.

He Had a Dream

I took some time this week to actually read Dr. King's speech. He had an amazing context for suffering and justice. I thank our Lord for the providence of sending him to be a catylist for such things. There's more to say, but I'll just link his speech here and come back later.

The Bride and Avarice

What about me?
I'm worth it.
So, morally I let lapse
some of the rules that hold me small
enough to fit through your door.

In fact, I've been thinking.
This whole arrangement of redemption
seems so vague that if
my bank account were beaming
I could see a bit more.

Of all the colors I can see,
its green that's most appealing.
Your comfort is fine and all,
but couldn't you help by building
a nest egg for my future?

Then maybe I'd have something
to nurture and trust in.
But look at me going on. Being
like everybody else.

I have priorities, you know.
Truth, justice, equality and love.
The bank account just goes to show
all my hard worth... er work.

no boat... (revised)

I was just reading through all my old posts and found this one that needed revision:

No Boat...

i am niles.
i am loved.
i am married.
i am a father
i am a friend.
i am a stranger.
i am a musician.
i am arguably the best guitarist ever known.
i am obsessive.
i am a bad story teller.
i am thus a bad blogger.
i am broken from the fall.
i am being repaired daily.
i am trying to be better than you.
i am trying to stay in the boat.
i am trying to push others out.
i am not getting it.
there is no boat.

Hello?

So, its been about 2 years since I've posted. In lieu of being creative, I'd like to bring back one of my favorite poems from a couple years ago. I know; I'm a hard worker.

a memphis breakfast in new york

memphis boarded

the airplane, his window lies
next to winged freedom that flies
overlooking memphis skies
gently fading to the night

later on

the drive to his hotel
racking his mind as to what she'll
be wearing with her coffee and bagel
making early conversation as their inhibitions fell

the nextmorning came off sweetly

she had the omelet, hold the meat
he had the peppered ham to eat
they watched the people, hardly speaking

to each other

this seemed normal
waiting your entire life to travel
one thousand and ninety-eight miles
only to be more entangled

in a beloved silent lovesong

------------------------------

Bent

I was recently sent this bent fable for my review. I'll list it first and then presently, my thoughts about it. It apparently touched something in me:
----------------------------------------------------------
A mother asked President Bush,
"Why did my son have to die in Iraq?"
Another mother asked President Kennedy,
"Why did my son have to die in Viet Nam?"
Another mother asked President Truman,
"Why did my son have to die in Korea?
Another mother asked President F.D. Roosevelt,
"Why did my son have to die at Iwo Jima?"
Another mother asked President W. Wilson,
"Why did my son have to die on the battlefield of France?"
Yet another mother asked President Lincoln,
"Why did my son have to die at Gettysburg?"
And yet another mother asked President G. Washington,
"Why did my son have to die near Valley Forge?"
Then long, long ago, a mother asked...
"Heavenly Father, why did my Son have to die
on a cross outside of Jerusalem?"
The answers to all these are similar --
"So that others may have life and dwell in peace,
happiness and freedom."
-----------------------------------------------------------
My thoughts/reflections:

Hmmm. I don't remember her asking that, but for the sake of the argument: Seems like its a way to justify the death of war using the birth of Christ. Seems kinda warm and fuzzy, but alot of those other wars were waged for various different reasons and not always the same as the current war in Iraq. I mean, someone could go back to every war in history and make up the same "a mother asked" scenario. I think just because its a war doesn't mean its right.

Bottom line: I think its crappy for someone to use the birth of Christ to make this point. Which, I think is flawed too. Lets take a look at that: "The answers to all these are similar --'So that others may have life and dwell in peace,happiness and freedom.'"

So, Jesus died so that others may have life and dwell in peace, happiness and freedom? Lets really think about that. Paul, you have your hand raised; do you have a question? Paul said, "Yeah, once Christ came into my life I presented his Love my whole life and was constantly tortured and eventually killed because of it. So, what happened to my freakin' peace?". Oh, while we're at it lets ask the rest of the Christian Martyrs over the years why they really think Christ died. I bet it won't be close to the above.

The reason Jesus died wasn't to let us dwell in peace, happiness and freedom. He died at the hands of man to fulfill the burden placed on man since the fall and in that restore the relationship between He and us. He died because He Loved his creation and wanted us to be how and who we were created to be.

And in that relationship we are free, but the Word also says we're slaves to Christ.

In this relationship we find Joy, not happiness, because being happy is when I get that big slab of pancakes and by the time I'm done I'm sick of it. Its temporal.

He does give us peace. But not peace as in if I walk around in Iraq I won't get shot because I'm a Christian. No, its peace in that if I'm walking around in Iraq and get shot, my peace is in my relationship with my Creator and no matter what might happen to my physical body, my spirit/soul belongs to Christ and no one can take that.

The Word talks about the battle against the one who can kill both soul and body. We should not be worried about physical peace.

Its the popular american bent christianity that makes arguments like this. And it should be torn down by the very Word that it bends to fit its purposes.

-rant over.